a truth (in short)

a truth (in short).

a truth (in short)

take flight on the wings of a dragonfly

stretch your arms 

feel the wind

listen to the whistle of air

listen

the sun is bright on skin melanin deepens

bakes and rises

becomes golden

throw your head back and smile

cuddle the dragonfly with legs

hug it

the dragonfly is doing God’s work in carrying you

so give it love because it knows your heart is pure and solid

wiggle your fingers

the air cuts lightly through

wiggle some more

laugh cry out loud and in urgency

become a little dizzy

stomach may become queasy

doesn’t matter

hug the dragonfly with your legs still

for you are soaring in a new normal pattern

you must not look down

this time you must keep your head back and smile

anger is slow to rise

you are overcoming evil by doing good

look around at your scenery

though the dragonfly flies fast you can see sharp

all colors are robust and pronounced

vision is clear

as you are human

loving and learning to do better than what you used to

give yourself credit

pat yourself on the back

stop

smell the roses

orchids lilacs

trees are your shade sometimes

you will run into people

face on

yet

you have taken flight on a dragonfly

you are not walking alone

you are in good hands

stay encouraged 

true to your heart

keep your head back and smile.

Completion

means its final…from a start…came a finish…an end…a new beginning from an end…its a fulfillment…an accomplishment….a promise to oneself to go through…the mud and muck…the lies and deceit…self-hate and self-abuse…its an achievement…it relates to being intact…it is a conclusion to a question…it is endurance…walking through rain shoulders back…neck paining…back hurting…endurance-to abide…to persist…be a mosquito to your goal…smell the blood…search the area for the blood…puncture the skin…and suck…to outlast and outlive…a survival tactic…we have to remain…to wait…endure…to linger… to stay focused… in the winds standing strong tree bark our leaves are to sway yet our bodies are to endure…in any season…any environment…long and slow we must suffer, while working and eagerly waiting…while in movement…motion…kindness…love…to our person…and to others…dont quit is a poem…it is inspiration…it is real…life is real…we are tangible and impressionable upon each other…so if I see you press on…then the impression left on me is to press on…it is a cycle…a repeat…repete…redo…a daily routine…out the box…yet on your square…we are chess pieces on a board…strategic our thinking and actions must be…we must stop self-torture…with our thinking…will put us in a jail cell…put us in a box on the corner…under the watchful eye of a fist…daily…beating…we put ourselves through… confusing thoughts…evil thoughts…sexual thoughts…depressing thoughts…random thoughts that we have pondered over to no avail we are dumb humans like that at times…forgetting we are the answer to most questions…forgetting forgiveness…weeping willows we are hunched over and rocking in a wave we are…five steps ahead of the game yet think we know not what we know to survive…its not easy…its awkward…uncomfortable…itchy…we want comfort…immediately…instant gratification…oats…rice…starches are to be cooked slow to retain texture and taste…bechamel is a mother sauce and must be created with patience and respect…risotto has to be babysat…our dreams have to be babysat…we must patiently nurture what we create in the mind…stop nurturing hate and pain…nurture ones mind for a completion…struggling for good feels way better than struggling for bad…it is the simple things and thoughts that produce quality…we are the details in this pattern of life…let ourselves be fine stitchings instead of tattered threads…sweat and pain and fear for a positive change feels good…you are blessed when you step on faith and change…you are beloved…blessed are those who endure…no matter the faith and what you may call God…blessed…are those who endure…completion…is a bittersweet sweet topping…it is a savory sweet…stand straight…love yourselves…pray…

dig…

untitled. for yesterday.

is never what it was

it is an imagination.

a memory.

a series of events we have fought through…

we are making sandcastles with plastic spoons

digging in the beaches we stroll on

with glass in the sand

slivers in our feet

fingers bent, cramping from balls of fists

throwing tantrums

not wanting to relive

when reliving is really the only thing that keeps us moving towards something…

greater than

always expecting less than our worth, our true purpose for being, knowing our roles and places in situations…

i remember people use to say math aint never gonna be used past high school

congruency and formulas

Area and X

if and then statements run the course of a life span

these are strategies

we must play this game as a springboard chess match

in 3-D we should be wearing armour and blocking

sand grains are weighing my feet down

we are trudging through millions of sand grains

we build sandcastles

abstract human beings with various thought patterns

must listen and understand the next man to truly understand ourselves

i know this

who we were is who we are and who we will be

the change is the way in which we handle our reaction…

it is the way in which we hold our tongue

we are so quick to slay with tongue

defiling our character cause we can’t talk better

reliving yesterdays

hating them instead of looking towards the sky

cause the sky is blue and its bright with sun

and thanking our yesterdays for appearing in their grimy attire,

in their dark clothes and musty scent

thank you yesterday

for beating me pulpy, abusing joy and not making it easy,

a fourth time yesterday will always be

a fifth time yesterday

and no more will be spoken about it

no more will we harp on our shortcomings

I most times pray for all

that we

myself one hundred percent included

pay attention to where we put our energy

the beaches that we go to and bask in the sun, the humans around us,

who admire and want this strength

we possess…people

all huemans, youmans, make up your true essence, your aura…

with love. with faith. with belief. with joy. and a smile.

it always has to end with a smile,

fingers and toes dirty from the sand…its okay…sand is cool, and it is natural…and it is brown…i like the hues of brown…light dark…..even non-brown colors I love got brown in them…smile…

I am…for this life is chess….it is never checkers…and what we think and we say, we become…..every second, so being sharp is necessary.

all words and forms are necessary.

all love and life is urgent.

stop dragging your spoons and dig…

dig.

dig.

bless.

Twenty-One (for EHFH) II

This is part TWO. The first Twenty-One describes what this is…dig.(archives)

1. I performed my first poem at the age of 19 at The Humidor in Cleveland, Ohio; on west 6th st. I then went on to become a regular and won 200 dollars for my poem “216″. And I have been on stage since. I am now 32.

2. Once, a mentor of mines, walked me around East Cleveland while he was dribbling a basketball and doing tricks. While walking, I had to perform my “Mary J” Poem…when I performed it the following week to a crowd of 100 at The Spy Bar, I had what seemed like an outer body experience. It was pure bliss and connection, between the audience, the people…and myself. I love him for that exercise and his teaching of techniques.

3. One of my mentors is getting married and I am just ecstatic. He deserves love.

4. I have 7 tattoos and plan on getting more.

5. I don’t have conversations on politics, war, anything involving the government. Period.

6. I have very animated and important conversations with my friend Eris’ niece, Suga B. She is 4 years old and a Sagittarius.

7. My mother is the most important person in my life.

8. I love both of my parents, unconditionally.

9. One time, in the summer, I remember my mother and I were walking down Euclid, by Playhouse Square and we saw one of my mentors. He told me that I could perform for these group of kids at this workshop that he was giving for this event that they have called Centerfest. I did. Then, he had to give a performance on Playhouse stage. The big stage, and he told me I could too. There were children and their parents in the audience, a nice crowd. I was too excited and honored. I mean a stage is a stage…and I love them. A few months later, that year, I was at the bus-stop downtown Cleveland and a young boy was standing with his mom. My afro was picked out…I was on my way to The Touch Supper Club…the young boy looked up at me, smiled and said “you that poet”, and I said “yes, I am!” smiling, and he said, smiling, “I remember you from Centerfest, you was on the big stage…you was good” and I smiled, and I said “thank you…thank you very much…” and I looked at his mom, and she was smiling at me and nodding her head…

10. My mother just told me the other day that she was walking into Rite-Aid on Harvard, and a car full of young women yelled…”Hey Kisha’s mommy, heyyyyy!! funny.

11. I met Ghostface in 2009 at Beachland Ballroom in Cleveland, Ohio. My gig and I got to hang out with him after the concert on his tour bus. highlight of my life.

12. I was born in Germany in the last month, on the last day of 1979.

13. I look in the mirror all of the time. I have since I was a child.

14. I dance in the mirror also.

15. Since I was a child I wanted to be a dancer. Like Alvin Ailey professional dancing.

16. I have been reading since I was like 17 months old.

17. My mother says I was a good baby, and a good child.

18. I am naturally clumsy.

19. I wear a size 11 women’s shoe.

20. When it rains outside, no matter what, I have to fight to make my sparkle appear when smiling.

21. I know I am to be a wife to someone… sometime…soon.

a poem…

a poem….

a poem…

my aunt just told me she is learning to take people for who they are

I agreed

I am also learning to not judge or be the bearer of truth to all that have ears

for they do not listen

then I am left angered

at such foolishness of not picking up the jewels

being beaver or squirrel my brain is always trying to gather up the nuts and store them for the winter season

everyone is not made up in same cells

as different beings we gather for our seasons in various waves and patterns

I’m learning

synergy is sometimes false flashing light

an illusion

people are magic tricks out here in this daily we strive for every night

we lay down and prayerfully we pray

or say a word of gratitude

show some respect

to Earth

if nothing else for not stopping its rotation

its movement

brains are not as sharp as others

people don’t exactly know how to tell truths

so they make up things

I know no ones perfect

I’m not

in the least

I understand a person is who they are

makes sense

individuals

its just…

people put on new faces before their season is even up for the old face

subconsciously? (pause/thought)

are excuses, people are, the excuses that they use as language

excuses are rainy days outside without the proper rain gear

they are the swarm of gnats around a rotten banana

worthless and annoying…

because when one is  full of worth there isn’t a change in the step

the conversations stay steady and cool-tempered

one is kind and respectful

to all

does not disregard another

its sad I say

to never change

to never feel a clear mind and a soft heart

to be indecisive and confused

to be needy

to be clingy

afraid to be alone

it is sad to not tell the truth

say things and don’t carry them out

half-ass do what you full-mouthed

disgusting

my fingers are typing at this moment not pointing

this is an enlightenment of sorts

to be you

whoever that you is

its the consistent thinkers who get where they want to go

it is the BALANCING of oneself against others that is important

not the ego, the pride, the past…

piss on the past

dismantle what you didn’t do

and get to doing

cause unnecessary sorrow is a downfall.

to pity oneself and his/her sufferings for anything is decaying to the spirit living in the vessel

which is you

and that’s law.

dig.

 

 

 

 

random…( for hh)

being gifted is a blessing

learning how to maneuver through the gifts is the balancing act

not being able to emote like normal

can’t get mad and cuss

must do what’s right

their are times when I don’t want to

when I want to be like everyone else

and be rude to those who are rude to me

tell him that he’s a piece of shit who never raised me

that he has and always will be my afterthought

piece of shit

not right my angel just told me

I called her in Atlanta on her way to work

she told me to calm down I don’t want to calm down

I don’t want to pray today

I don’t want to be nice today.

It is my nature to cuss and be angry

I have put so many years in learning that skill

in perfecting that part of my attitude

those that don’t know it you are spared

from a sharp tongue and an even sharper heart

my initials are KNF for a reason

because I am knife and I cut

because I am blade and I go in deep

because I am edge of paper and I slit

thank my mom for these initials

for this name

and she carries the weight of the other so I can be free

she is a saint in so many ways

she is my parent playing dual roles

he is a cancerous sore I pick at and expose

he is now a scab

he is ignorance and the worst part of who I am

piece of shit

fucking asshole

I could cut him

I want to so bad

it makes me bite my lip his dumb thinking

my sister, my brother, and I are smarter than him on our worst days

I want him to read this

I want him to print this out and paste it somewhere where he can read this

where it can cut him

because he is the sperm that created my being

and he is a piece of shit

and hopefully someone can pray that I pray for him

because he knows not what he does

yet when a man you should act as one

he has never been one

because you have equipment as a man doesn’t make you one

I am more man than him

and I am woman

I am daughter

not his equal

yet I am leaving that love at the door of God

cutting him away

he is the bad part of paper

he is wilted flower

he is sad sack of shit that I flush down the toilet

he is father not mines

he is cut off and who cares how he feels

he is manipulative and deceptive

he needs to leave me alone

he needs to leave me alone

he needs to read this and leave me the fuck alone before I cut him with my words

because I am from Cleveland and really don’t give a fuck about him

in real life

must honor him cause that’s what God says

so I can do that from afar

like my brother

who calls him nothing and feels nothing for him

how lucky he is

to not to have to feel love for an ignorant mass of flesh

who could have been great and missed all opportunities

still missing them

piece of shit

i feel deadened and he can fuck off

what father tells their daughter to go shit in a hat

what father reveals himself then cowers away

piece of shit

can kiss my ass

and fuck off

don’t bother about me

again.

its not over…

its not over….

its not over…

killing innocent teenagers is an unspoken doctrine within our government

it is what fuels this economy

blood spends

its remnants are intertwined in the hemispheres

ground steams with its  hot spill

an innocence snatched and forgotten

family learning new without

watching the walls in their houses

because the news highlights every detail

of their tragedy

the powers that be watch the news

they hear the people roaring for answers

they ignore

they have always turned a blind eye

this is protocol

senseless murders are ate with the morning coffee

crime scenes and bloody carcasses

they highlight we view

and we complain

and we sit

we do not have answers

we are programmed and our fuses are disconnecting

it is as sweet as American Pie

who really has ever tasted American Pie

are its apples bittersweet on the tongue stinging

equal to the tangy truths we are expected to meld into

to say I am proud to be

is not as easy as it used ta

does not hold the same weight it did in the arms of the freedom riders

the college kids who wanted to see justice cause they were sent visions

of the future

our present

this mayhem that is our land of liberty

they don’t want more college kids that will change this system

they want this system to blow out

so they send trained killers to be everyday folk to kill our youth

our bright and very illumined minds

they hate that we can acquire knowledge

they try to keep it

the government is multiracial

so these killings aren’t a black or white thing

others races just have better sense of finance and loyalty than those two

they were not around on this land when it was just black and white

people of other nations don’t know how to play cut-throat spades…

there is no ending

this is not over.